


Dear Love

by JosephineLiesmith



Series: Love Letters [1]
Category: Captain America - All Media Types
Genre: Bucky Barnes Recovering, Bucky's a Sap, Kind of therapeutic, Letters, Love Letters, M/M, Sappy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-13
Updated: 2019-02-13
Packaged: 2019-10-27 11:30:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17765972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JosephineLiesmith/pseuds/JosephineLiesmith
Summary: The first Love Letter in this series, based on a love letter writing challenge.'Maybe one day I'll send you these. Maybe I'll send them anyway. It might make you feel better... I'd like that.'Bucky is on the run still, and somewhere he saw some advice that writing letters to someone can be therapeutic. So, it's worth a shot, right? You're not supposed to send them. But he's always had a soft spot for Steve, and maybe it might give him some time.





	Dear Love

**Author's Note:**

> This is meant to be a sort of.. ease back into writing alone. And the inspiration came from an image I saw of a writing challenge from 2016 which can be seen here: http://rebeccaaddison.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/May-Writing-Challenge.jpg.

Dear Love,

So, I saw somewhere that writing letters and just.. Not sending them can be a good form of therapy. So I’m giving it a shot. Better than sitting in front of a shrink, right? Cheaper too. Not to mention the whole on-the-run thing would make it a little detrimental, you’d probably show up and it’d be awkward. Writing letters seems a lot more convenient. And there’s things to write them to, you know? But since you’re all I’ve got. Well, I’m gonna be talking to you the whole time. Most of the time, anyway. I’ve got a journal, I’m putting the prompts for sending them in that. When I get time, or just feel like it, I’ll write another one.

 

Some people burn the letters after they write them, but I don’t know if I’ll do that. I might just keep them instead. Maybe one day I’ll send you these. Maybe I’ll send them anyway. It might make you feel better... I’d like that.

 

I know you haven’t stopped looking for me, but you should. Just.. for a while. Maybe not forever. I need time, is all, you know? Figure myself out. My head it.. it just ain’t on right. Yet. I’m hoping I can sort it out, at least a little. I keep getting flashbacks. Memories. But I can’t place all of them. Some are good, like remembering you. Remembering us. Late, cold nights. Summers on the fire escape. On the roof watching fireworks. Coney Island.

 

Some.. aren’t good. It’s a lot of pain, of orders and blindly following them. Occasionally of... sort of waking up? But having no control over my body. I’ve struggled staying in cold places. I wake up groggy and disoriented most of the times I do that. Like they’ve just defrosted me. Other times I’ll wake up with my fist stuck in the wall, things broken around me but with no memory of breaking them.

 

Those moments are why you need to stop looking for me, Stevie. I can’t come back to you like that. Like this. I couldn’t hurt you again, okay? Just. Let me try and do this. If in time I can’t help myself anymore, then I’ll find you. Or if I feel like I’m ready. But I’m not yet. And it’s not safe for you to keep following me. So please just... back off. If I end up caving in and sending you this, I’ll send the rest of the letters that’ll follow this one too. Let you know I’m alive, and that I’m as okay as I’m gonna be. Keep you updated.

 

Maybe that’d stop your reckless punk ass from following me.

‘Til next time, Love.

 

 

 

_P.S. Looks like I’m sending this. Apparently I’m sappy, which is new to learn. Plus, your kicked puppy face when you just missed me is hard to look at. So, go home, please._

_Bucky._


End file.
